4:54 PM

Experiencing Old-fashioned Hospitality

Are you acquainted with the quote of Maya Angelou, the one where she talks about how someone made you feel? “I’ve learned people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Well, my husband and I experienced this feeling big time a few weeks ago and while I am still waiting for spring to really hit here in the Northeast and get creatively inspired, I wanted to tell you about it.

***Since this a story about hospitality and not an action I have done in this regard, I am going to share links to modern entertaining items that might encourage you to get into the act of hospitality and hosting for yourself. This is not an affiliated post. I do not have the technical expertise to manage that. I am simply sharing some helpful information with you to go along with my story. Please click onto the link below the photos.

Since moving to Boxford, Massachusetts three years ago I have had the pleasure of meeting new people. One such person is Jane. The funny thing about this new friendship is that Jane happens to be one of the best friends of my sister-in-law Barbara. Barbara lives near where my old home was and is about an hour away from my present home. Both Barbara and Jane are approximately 15 years my seniors, which makes the friendship different, if not unlikely, but it has been a blessing to me. Jane is a wonderful and loving person, and I have truly enjoyed being in her company. Another fact I haven’t mentioned is my husband has known Jane and her husband, Dean, for much of his life but has not been in contact with them since his youth. That changed when we moved and I met Jane. Jane and Dean are new friends to me. I met Jane through a community church group that I decided to join when I first moved here.

Enough of the background. Now to the way we were made to feel. Jane and Dean invited Tom and I to lunch at their home a few weeks ago, along with Barbara, who is a recent widow. Jane and Dean and Barbara and Johnny, her beloved husband and our brother-in-law, were great friends. Tom and I were honored to be included in the invitation since it was a special time of visiting and reminiscing for the three of them.

Charcuterie Board

Pampered Chef Charcuterie Board

As soon as we arrived, we were escorted into the living room where crackers and cheese and fruit were displayed on a tray. We were quickly offered beverages. We chose a tasty drink of cranberry juice and, I think, ginger ale. We sat in the living room for quite a while as we heard about old stories of Dean’s days in the Navy. He served as chaplain and I believe he served in Vietnam. He talked about his time also working in Portsmouth, New Hampshire as a chaplain in a military prison and an unsuccessful escape that happened there during his tenure. Tom and I were mesmerized by the stories. Of course, there were stories of my brother-in-law, Johnny, as well, who had also served in the Navy. All of it was so pleasant and very comfortable.

Crate and Barrel Charcuterie Board

Insisting she needed no help, Jane went to the kitchen to get the lunch meal ready. You have to understand I rarely have anything more than a sandwich for lunch. For me, lunch is a meal to get through so that I can continue on with my day. I look forward to my big meal at dinner. Tom and I have lived our married lives mostly this way. My only recollection of an afternoon large meal was when I was a child, and we would have Sunday dinners with my grandparents. I loved being with them and I loved the food but have never been able to carry on with that tradition myself. So, this mid-week large afternoon meal was new to me.

From Amazon - Extra Large Pie Plate

Jane set out a homemade chicken pot pie, homemade bread, greens beans and, perhaps, potatoes. I am fuzzy on the details at the moment. Everything was delicious and sharing this meal felt as natural as it could be. Dean and Jane continued to encourage conversation and we all contributed. What I remember most is Jane talking about her Scandinavian roots and stories of going to visit her family in their home country. I’ve waited so long to write this post that I have forgotten which Scandinavian country Jane's family came from, but I remember how interesting it all was. Jane and Dean make you feel right at home. In other times I have been with Jane, she has spoken of her three grown children, along with grown grandchildren with spouses, coming from across the country to stay with them for weeks in the summer. I marveled at that because while their home is very comfortable and lovely and not small, it didn’t appear to be able to house that many people for that long. I wondered to myself how these visits worked out. After visiting with Jane and Dean I knew exactly why the family came from far away and maybe had to share a few common spaces for a while. These are special people and it is a joy to be around them.

From Amazon - Cottage Core Tablecloth

To my surprise, the meal ended with key lime pie that Jane had made. That too was delicious. I was in awe of Jane. I have long since lost the confidence of cooking and baking for company, except on holidays and, in truth, I always manage to mess something up. To be honest, it seems our lives have changed in not-so-recent times, and we are often on the go. It is easier to meet people at a restaurant or order take-out. After experiencing the labor of love that day, I wanted to get out my crumpled-up apron and give old-fashioned hospitality a try again! It is an art that may be somewhat lost. Thankfully there are still people like Jane, Dean and Barbara around who can teach us or just remind of us of what we used to know!

From Amazon - Cottage Core Tablecloth

Unfortunately, my life does not award me that luxury right now. Our focus is on our daughter Brittany and helping her in any way we can as she battles breast cancer. But it has now become a goal of mine to try to entertain when given the chance with the love and comfort like that of Jane and Dean. They made us feel like family, something that has always been of supreme importance to me and my husband. The whole afternoon was warm and familiar.

From Amazon - Cottage Core Dinnerware

So, now I am back to Maya Angelou. I can’t say as I remember everything we talked about or everything that was offered to eat but, I do remember having a very warm, fuzzy and welcoming feeling that day at Dean and Jane’s home. It is possible that what I have described here is something you always experience when you are visiting with people. For me, this felt like a time gone by. My husband’s family was always great at hosting and making you feel welcome. My grandparents were wonderful, as well. These memories feel like a long time ago, however. Perhaps, it is time to try to bring some of these traditions, customs back, if we can.